Is That Andy?

I’ve seen this statue driving by for many years. It’s about 2 miles from a statue of a horse that’s…defiantly well hung.

After doing some research, I found that it cost Solid Rock Church (most likely a Christian cult) spent a quarter of a million dollars to erect this 16,000 pound, 62 foot tall, off-white statue on the side of Interstate 75.

Big Butter Jesus - Heywood Banks.

In southern Ohio, just north of Cincinnati
I beheld a vision, next to the expressway.
Was a 60 foot Jesus, with his hands in the air
looks like he’s carved out of butter,
just like at the state fair.

Big butter Jesus
Sweet cream Jesus
Oh country fresh Jesus
Unsalted Jesus
Oh Promise Jesus
Imperial Jesus
Can’t believe it’s not Jesus
Oleo Lord.

Well you see him from the chest up
like he’s about to do a back flip,
or maybe scored a touchdown
or maybe melting or about to drown.
Ya know, I’ve been to the state fair
seen a cow made out of corn cobs
Steven Hawking made of string cheese
and the virgin out of olives.

Big butter Jesus
Sweet cream Jesus
Oh country fresh Jesus
Unsalted Jesus
Oh Promise Jesus
Imperial Jesus
Can’t believe it’s not Jesus
Oleo Lord.

Shipped in pieces on a flatbed
staring backwards was his big head
Driver stuck in traffic backups
desperately avoiding eye contact
Well don’t make no graven images.
I think it’s one of the 10 commandments
I hope the grading curve is kindly
You get into heaven with a 90

Big butter Jesus
Sweet cream Jesus
Oh country fresh Jesus
Unsalted Jesus
Oh Promise Jesus
Imperial Jesus
Can’t believe it’s not Jesus
Oleo Lord.

Can’t believe it’s not Jesus.